I really believe with every fiber of my being (and I eat Grape Nuts cereal...so that's a ton of fiber) that boys don't know dating protocol in college anymore.
It used to be:
1. Meet a cute girl in class, maybe through a mutual friend. ("Hey, wow, nice to meet you, you know Jake.")
2. Hang out soberly, a few commonalities, maybe an inside joke or two ("I love JR Tolkien." "Oh, cool, I'm really original and heady too.")
3. Get a number ("Hey, let me get your number, I'll text you when I get home and see if I'm missing the third book and need to borrow it.")
4. Boy initiates sober/semi sober meeting ("Hey, Big Bad Wolves just set up, wanna go get some before lab? Or we could skip lab and you can come to Best Buy with me because my ears are really small and I lost my special headphones.")
5. More flirting, more commonalities, kiss probably a few days later ("Wow, that was everything I hoped for, do you by chance use Rosebud Salve? I want you to meet Mom.")
(Over the span of a few days, if not a week)
In 2010 Tuscaloosa,
1. Meet drunkenly ("Huuuh sorry, didn't mean to dump my beer on you!")
2. Neither party goes running ("It's ok, I love beer!")
3. Share a few commonalities ("Weird me too! I also love war reenactment shows!")
4. Take shots together ("again! again! Wait are you about to vom? Oh you're not? Wow you're a champ! Must be in a srat...hot.")
5. Trade numbers ("Wait, 281? oh 251! haha 5 is a funny number.")
6. Text the next night to meet up again drunkenly ("Going out tonight?")
7. Go home together and make out ("You're awesome. You taste like a baby bomb.")
(Span of 2 days)
Boys just don't have a clue about social convention anymore; they think if a girl isn't down to go home the first or second night, she's playing hard to get, thus looking for a serious boyfriend, which even to guys looking for girlfriends is AH! REAL MONSTERS scary.
The demise, however, is that once you've established the fact that you're fun and laid back, they feel silly bombarding you with texts and calls in a non-social situation (ie a test week) and therefore leave the relationship open-ended and solely for the weekends.
Another aspect of note is the fact that texting has TAKEN OVER. If his texts are few and far between, or just vague, then assume he's DOING SOMETHING or that he DOESN'T LIKE YOU. Let's assume he does. Also let's assume he lives across the street. If you analyze every punctuation and verb tense, then you might as well perch yourself on your window sill and document every flicker of light, every crack of the door, and everytime you think you hear a boy's voice coming from that house BECAUSE THAT IS LOCO.
It used to be:
1. Meet a cute girl in class, maybe through a mutual friend. ("Hey, wow, nice to meet you, you know Jake.")
2. Hang out soberly, a few commonalities, maybe an inside joke or two ("I love JR Tolkien." "Oh, cool, I'm really original and heady too.")
3. Get a number ("Hey, let me get your number, I'll text you when I get home and see if I'm missing the third book and need to borrow it.")
4. Boy initiates sober/semi sober meeting ("Hey, Big Bad Wolves just set up, wanna go get some before lab? Or we could skip lab and you can come to Best Buy with me because my ears are really small and I lost my special headphones.")
5. More flirting, more commonalities, kiss probably a few days later ("Wow, that was everything I hoped for, do you by chance use Rosebud Salve? I want you to meet Mom.")
(Over the span of a few days, if not a week)
In 2010 Tuscaloosa,
1. Meet drunkenly ("Huuuh sorry, didn't mean to dump my beer on you!")
2. Neither party goes running ("It's ok, I love beer!")
3. Share a few commonalities ("Weird me too! I also love war reenactment shows!")
4. Take shots together ("again! again! Wait are you about to vom? Oh you're not? Wow you're a champ! Must be in a srat...hot.")
5. Trade numbers ("Wait, 281? oh 251! haha 5 is a funny number.")
6. Text the next night to meet up again drunkenly ("Going out tonight?")
7. Go home together and make out ("You're awesome. You taste like a baby bomb.")
(Span of 2 days)
Boys just don't have a clue about social convention anymore; they think if a girl isn't down to go home the first or second night, she's playing hard to get, thus looking for a serious boyfriend, which even to guys looking for girlfriends is AH! REAL MONSTERS scary.
The demise, however, is that once you've established the fact that you're fun and laid back, they feel silly bombarding you with texts and calls in a non-social situation (ie a test week) and therefore leave the relationship open-ended and solely for the weekends.
Another aspect of note is the fact that texting has TAKEN OVER. If his texts are few and far between, or just vague, then assume he's DOING SOMETHING or that he DOESN'T LIKE YOU. Let's assume he does. Also let's assume he lives across the street. If you analyze every punctuation and verb tense, then you might as well perch yourself on your window sill and document every flicker of light, every crack of the door, and everytime you think you hear a boy's voice coming from that house BECAUSE THAT IS LOCO.
Shape up and fly right, women of college. If he wants you, he'll get you. If he doesn't, stop forcing him to respond to texts like this one, "Hey, are you in front of Bruno? I think I just saw you." And if you really can't stop, simply delete his number so you don't work up the five-shot courage to send "hye cmoe 2 gattelles" from your perfectly able bodied text hands.
Can ya dig it?
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